tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-86015197866046879102024-02-08T07:28:07.992-08:00Bully’s Movie ReviewsAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.comBlogger53125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-51535570027622992592014-07-06T12:44:00.003-07:002014-07-07T11:42:44.000-07:0022 Jump Street<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>③ (out of
5)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">The thin-then-fat-then-thin-then-fat-again
bloke from SuperBad and actor from, er, 21 Jump Street have teamed up once again to make the obligatory sequel. This time the dumb nuts go to college to bumble
their way through another drug investigation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Even though
we’ve seen this all before the movie pays off. It pays off because the
chemistry is right and the comic timing is tight. There’s a line near the
beginning of the movie where the boss - rapper Ice Cube – points to his swanky
new office in the middle of the room.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">“Ooh that’s
nice” says the fat one.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">“Yeah” says
the pretty one, “it’s sort of like a big block of ice shaped like a…square”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span>Ha ha.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN-US">By the
way, don’t read that joke if you haven’t seen the movie - it’ll spoil it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">The mayhem
and banter are by the book but you love this movie because it pokes fun at
itself so we don’t have to. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">“Oh look”
says SuperBad as he stares at the new complex going up across the street - ‘23 Jump Street, Coming Soon!’ – "perhaps we
can move in there next?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN-US">“Don’t get
ahead of yourself” says smooth dude, averting his eyes from the camera.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span><span lang="EN-US">Ha ha again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Oh don’t read that joke if you haven’t see the movie, it’ll spoil it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-82527385828029249772014-07-06T12:43:00.004-07:002014-07-07T13:28:19.064-07:00Godzilla<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>③ (out of
5)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Walter
White was never going to top his Heisenberg persona and for sure nobody will be
saying his name after this. Hell, I can’t even remember what his character is called.
But it doesn’t matter because he fails to stop the monster anyway and gets
bumped off early on so we can concentrate on the sexy CGI.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN-US">‘Ooh…CGI’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Godzilla is
good blockbuster fodder. It isn’t remotely memorable or amazing - I’m writing
this 6 weeks after watching it and racking my brains trying to remember what
happened, but it's good entertainment. I think. Hmm, now let me see…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Rack, rack…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">There was a
ruckus in Japan…a swim to America…Monsters in
Vegas then a bout in… some city near the sea (New York? LA?). Oh
and Walter White’s son running around shouting… I think he might have saved the
day?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Phew that
was exhausting. </span><br />
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN-US">Mental note: Next time write the review right after seeing
the movie.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-49154378480541282014-07-06T12:43:00.002-07:002014-07-06T12:56:19.131-07:00Neighbours<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>③ (out of
5)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I wasn’t
too sure about watching Neighbours but my wife persuaded me:<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">‘We need
some brain candy’ she said, as I stuffed the bag of mega M&M's into my coat pocket.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">For one
thing I was thinking that SuperBad cop bloke’s shtick has been done to death.
The cutesy dialogue, the beer gut, the laugh…yeah yeah we get it. And Zak Effron, I keep expecting him to break into a
dance.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN-US">But, well -
Neighbours turned out to be OK.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Watching
the late show with a gaggle of Frat Boys and Co-Eds certainly added to the
amusement. It was like we were laughing twice. Once at the jokes and again at
the kids roaring behind us. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">In the end
my brain got the sugar rush it was after. Or maybe that was the mega bag of
M&M’s...?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-42400901642059366592014-07-06T12:42:00.001-07:002014-07-06T12:59:43.078-07:00Non Stop<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>③ (out of
5)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Didn’t I
write a review for this already? Christ I have to start keeping up. I’m not a
very good blogger. The internet is a pain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Non Stop is
about Liam Neilson getting drunk whilst trying to save a plane. It starts with
the stock ooh-my-marriage-and-my-life-are-unraveling footage. You know the
shots: Flask of whisky, Stubbled chin, nasty phone call with the wife… Yeah yeah, your life is unravelling we get it. You’ve got nothing
left to lose.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Fortunately
this nonsense doesn’t take up too much of our time and soon we are up in
the air scratching our heads along with Air Marshall Neilson who struggles to
understand why he keeps getting texts about unexploded bombs…(curiously
we never do get to find out how they pulled this off).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">The ending
winds down weakly. The CGI crash at the end is crap. It’s like watching a black
and white disaster movie – c'mon Dorothy, call that a tornado? The plane crash from Alive –
filmed 20 years before – was better than this. Also, the bombers motivation is ludicrous.
Something about not enough terrorism and maintaining jobs for homeland security…?
Yeah right.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I can’t
remember what else happens because, like I said, it was a long time ago and I’m not a very good blogger.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-67378070512033870062014-07-06T12:41:00.002-07:002014-07-06T13:02:58.318-07:00Hold Fast<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>② (out of 5)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">There was
bugger all on at the movies in April wasn’t there? My wife and I got so
desperate we had to go watch a Canadian movie. Imagine that! </span><br />
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN-US">Hold Fast tells
the story of a Newfoundland teenager who loses his parents and has to move in
with his cousin, Aunt and Uncle. Uncle Gordy is not much fun though so Newfie Boy
runs away with his cousin to go frolic in the east coast countryside.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I was
looking forward to this movie so I could enjoy some stunning scenery but I was
little disappointed. There’s a few too many scenes in the suburbs, at the local
airport and at the strip mall. It all made me think that everywhere in the
world is starting to look the same. Never-the-less this movie was nice enough despite some stilted scenes they forgot to take out. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">You wonder
if stilted scenes would ever find their way into a Hollywood movie? It’s as if the Director watches it and says, ‘Ah leave
it in, it’s only a Canadian movie eh?’.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">For the record I have no
idea why this movie is called Hold Fast. Perhaps it’s a Newfie
expression…? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-83905016355847565092014-07-06T12:40:00.001-07:002014-07-06T13:03:49.193-07:00The Lunchbox<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>④ (out of 5)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Now here is
a lovely little movie. Bored wifey makes lunch for numpty hubby. Lunch gets mis-delivered
to bored stranger. Bored stranger and bored wifey send heartfelt notes to each
other. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Numpty
hubby has an affair.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">The bastard! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Stanger and
wifey try to meet. But...do they?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">No they don’t.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">You
probably should read any of that if you haven’t seen the movie, it might spoil
it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-73826646554979180822014-07-06T12:39:00.002-07:002014-07-06T13:04:58.379-07:00Blue Ruin<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>④ (out of 5)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Blue Ruin
is one long slow simmer of a movie. The suspense builds right from the get-go
when we learn that the main character, a homeless dude living out of his ‘Blue
Ruin’ shit box of a car, is faced with the release of his wife and kid’s killer…
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">What’s
he going to do? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">The action
is deliberate and mostly wordless. And why not? Why do we need words anyway when our actions are all that count?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Wow that
was profound.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">By the end
of the movie there is the sense that everything was inevitable and yet, nobody won. A lot like life then, right?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Wow, I’ve
blown my mind…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-48430296429692111012014-07-06T12:39:00.000-07:002014-07-06T12:39:02.620-07:00Le Week End<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: ①
(out of 5)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Christ,
does this movie ever try too hard to be liked. It’s like that kid at school who
kept bringing in sweets. The problem is this movie is not likeable it’s a dick.
It is tiresome, tacky and wholly unoriginal. Hell, they are so desperate for
affection they even throw in a cutesy off-the-wall dance routine for the main
characters to enjoy – aw isn’t that quaint? No wait it isn’t. It’s right out of
Pulp Fiction! Shame.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">It wouldn’t
have mattered if Bridget Jones’ Dad and that woman I saw in something once were
actually doing something meaningful because of the one scene in the middle.
Have you ever seen a movie which gets sunk by one scene? I’m thinking King of
the world here. Yeah it’s that bad. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Picture
this:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Bridget
Jones’ Dad is on his knees staring up the skirt of his pretty, yet elderly,
wife. She opens up her legs while Daddy begs her to, ‘please, please! Let me
sniff it’.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Oh Christ. Thank God I’d finished my popcorn.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-48598441895542803372014-03-25T13:50:00.001-07:002014-03-25T13:50:24.399-07:00Alan Partridge (Alpha Papa)<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: #fb5e53;">Bullseyes: </span><span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><span style="background-color: #fb5e53;">④ (out of 5)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">North American’s struggle to ‘get’ Steve Coogan. Philamena aside, his
previous movies have never done that well. That may be because they weren’t
much good but it’s still a shame. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I grew up watching Steve Coogan’s satirical
TV Chat show, ‘Knowing Me Knowing You’, where he showcased the smarmy,
egotistical Partridge who berated, and even shot, his guests and eventually
nattered his way onto the lowest rung of the media ladder - local radio.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Alan Partridge the movie features North Norfolk Digital’s smooth as
sandpaper host acting as a hostage negotiator during a studio standoff. Given Partridge’s
crass and tactless interview style it’s not surprising he fails to tackle this
delicate task, well – delicately.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-23908480022755077932014-03-25T13:49:00.000-07:002014-03-25T13:49:03.966-07:00The Grand Budapest Hotel<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #444444;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: #fb5e53; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>④ (out of 5)</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: #fb5e53; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Wes Anderson movies are weird. Moonrise Kingdom was freaky. <u> </u></span><a href="http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/royal_tenenbaums/" target="_top"><span style="background-color: #e5eefa; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; border: 1pt none windowtext; color: black; padding: 0cm;">The Royal Tenenbaums</span></a> was wacky. I haven’t
seen any more but I’m sure they’re all out there. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">In The Grand Budapest Hotel the acting is so tongue in cheek it’s a
wonder you can hear any dialogue. The
movie starts smartly kicking out of the blocks with a suspicious death, a
disputed inheritance and a disgruntled family, and it never lets up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Ralph Fiennes, or Ray Fiennes however you pronounce Lord Voldemorts name,
has the Wes Anderson scripted deadpan down pat as he frolicks his way through the
hotel lobby and up and down the Hungarian countryside in his efforts to evade
the Munster faced family as they seek a bigger slice of the will. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">The best parts of the movie are the little moments of levity, brought to
us by Fiennes mainly, but also a great supporting cast including the Lobby Boy
bloke, Jeff Goldblum, Bill Murray, Adrien Brody, Willem Dafoe, Harvey Keitel
and Edward Norton. There are so many memorable characters in this farce you
almost lose track, but somehow Wes Anderson has a way of illuminating a new
face in an instant. When William Dafoe sneers and snaps on his black gloves over
his skull-embossed brass knuckles we know right away who he is - no boring back
story or dialogue is required. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: #fb5e53; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><span style="color: #444444;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-89019813866465043662014-02-25T13:23:00.002-08:002014-02-25T13:23:45.014-08:00Monuments Men<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Bullseyes:</span><span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #666666; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span><span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #666666; font-family: "Cambria Math","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math";">②<span style="background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"> (out
of 5)</span></span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I didn’t go
see this movie but Kathleen did. Kathleen should know better because she’s a
movie buff. She watches movies I’ve never heard of with sub-titles and
everything. Yeah she’s pretentious. I don’t know what she was thinking here,
the reviews were awful. Perhaps Trevor made her do it? Trevor likes Keanu
Reeves and car chases. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Anyway I’m
passing along Kathleen’s review notes which she texted to me on her way home so
we can all save ourselves some trouble:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">‘Just saw
Monuments Men. Load of crap. Maybe 2 moments in the movie I was endeared.
Soundtrack crap too. Clooney, crap. Whichever scene cate blanchette was in was
like a different movie, a good movie. Coulda been a Great story if it was made
by Tarantino! (that’s a joke by Kathleen because she knows how much I enjoyed
Inglorious Basterds). Was like the latest Indiana Jones shit movie mixed in
with 10 minutes of shindlers list. You can quote me.’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">And I did.
Thanks Kathleen! </span>Next time
just go to cinemaclock.com and read the reviews ;)</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-80537434193818491122014-02-25T13:22:00.004-08:002014-02-25T13:22:40.801-08:00Lone Survivor<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span><span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #666666; font-family: "Cambria Math","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math";">④<span style="background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"> (out of 5)</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #666666; font-family: "Cambria Math","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math";"><span style="background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #666666; font-family: "Cambria Math","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math";"><span style="background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Yet another
‘based on a true story’ Navy Seal escapade. Huh. How many of these can there be? I wonder. I
just finished watched Zero Dark Thirty. Aren’t these army operations supposed
to be ‘covert’? No wonder the terrorists are so effective.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">‘Ve have to
get into ze pentagon mein Kapitan’ (I don’t know why the terrorists have German
accents…it’s must be a WWII thing)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">‘How vill
ve do zis Helmut?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">‘I think I
have an old movie somevere’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">‘Great put
it on’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">‘Yavol. God
is good’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">‘Vat?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Lone
Survivor is a gory, shaky cam, POV style war caper. It’s as close as you can
get – or as close as I’ve ever gotten – to being inside a soldier’s helmet. And
after seeing this I know that inside a soldier’s helmet is no place I’d ever want
to be.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Danny
Walberg and his cohorts get dumped into the backwaters of Afghanistan (are there
any other type of waters in Afghanistan?), exposed by a bunch of goat herders
(why is it always goat herders?) and shot to pieces by the local Taliban. That’s
the plot basically, but, ‘shot to pieces’ doesn’t quite cover what you experience
on the screen. Yikes. This is one movie you wouldn’t want to see in 3D IMAX. You
literally see these poor sods getting plugged to death. It’s gruesome. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Of course
Marky Mark survives but there is no stirring soundtrack or feel good finale.
You leave the cinema with the same sense of hopelessness that all modern era
war movies seem to leave you with. Which makes you wonder – why do we keep
making all these wars if they never have any happy endings? John Wayne would
never have signed up for any of this.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-84837987430757267252014-01-02T10:33:00.001-08:002014-01-02T10:46:18.609-08:00American Hustle<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span>③ (out of 5)<span style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">
<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">American
Hustle is a fun time of a movie. It
tells the story of the abscam political bribe expose operation which I’d never
heard of but which is supposedly well-known. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">As with most ‘true stories’ (the caption at
the beginning of the film tells us that, ‘some of this actually happened’) the
plot meanders and you are never quite sure what’s supposed to happen next but
the acting keeps us invested, especially Jennifer Lawrence whose character is
so juicy I wished they’d built the whole movie around her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Amy
Adams is a little off – I got the feeling she was a little shallow for this
role - which is shame because she’s in almost every frame, but Amy Adams is smoking hot,
and barely half dressed for most of the movie so, you know - all is forgiven.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-87594488698177344502014-01-02T10:32:00.002-08:002014-01-02T10:45:25.167-08:00Rush<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span>④
(out of 5)<span style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> <span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">It’s
hard to make Formula 1 boring – except when you’re watching an actual race –
and Rush – the story of James Hunt’s 1976 Championship winning season – is
anything but. I’ve read Hunt’s biography
so I was a little nervous that Ron Howard was going to take Argo like liberties
with the plot – but no worries, it all panned out fine.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">First off the casting was excellent.
</span><span style="color: #002060; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-CA; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0117709/?ref_=tt_ov_st"><span class="itemprop"><span style="background: white; color: #002060; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;"><span itemprop="name" style="font-size: inherit;">Daniel
Brühl</span></span></span></a><span style="background: white;">,</span></span><span style="color: #002060; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> <span lang="EN-US">who
I’ve never heard of, as the meticulous German, Niki Lauder. And </span></span><span style="color: #002060; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-CA; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1165110/?ref_=tt_ov_st"><span class="itemprop"><span style="background: white; color: #002060; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;"><span itemprop="name" style="font-size: inherit;">Chris
Hemsworth</span></span></span></a></span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> as
the glamorous Hunt, were perfect. Had
Howard got the casting wrong this movie would have stalled on the grid, but as
it was, the movie screeched through the first corner and tore up the
track. Just be sure to shield your eyes
when they crash, and crash again. It all gets pretty gory…</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-78431009595642964482014-01-02T10:31:00.004-08:002014-01-02T10:44:20.449-08:00Philomena<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span>④
(out of 5)<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Like
kids and their kid movies I pretty much love anything Steve Coogan ever puts
out, even before I’ve seen it, and Philomena was no exception. Despite the seriousness of the subject matter
(Evil nuns! Bad Catholics! Boo!) Coogan injects his dry wit everywhere, the British
class system being a common comic source:
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-left: 20.25pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Judy
Dench opens a packet of Tunes (cough sweets) and offers one to Coogan
(Coogan: ‘A Tune? You hum it and I’ll sing it!’) <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 20.25pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">-<span style="font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Dench
tells everyone she meets, ‘you’re one in a million’. Coogan: ‘That’s statistically impossible!’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 20.25pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 2.25pt;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">But, Philomena is more than just an odd couple road
trip yarn, no wait – it isn’t. But whatever,
it is sweet, it’s Steve Coogan and it should definitely win an Oscar (Go
Steve!).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-21256760428242757672014-01-02T10:31:00.001-08:002014-01-02T10:43:37.610-08:00Hunger Games Catching Fire<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span>④
(out of 5)<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I had
the queasy feeling, halfway through the new Hunger Games installment, that I’d
seen this movie before. Everything
seemed so…familiar. And then I
remembered – I’d read the book! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">How did
that happen? I wondered. I never read movie books -
why would I? That’s like watching the
end of the football before rewinding to the kick off.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I hope there’s
lots of goals…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">The new
Hunger Games is great entertainment and, unlike the Hobbit movies, it doesn’t
leave you wanting less. Too bad I just
read the third book…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-59739654575505366992014-01-02T10:30:00.004-08:002014-01-02T10:43:03.964-08:00The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span>④
(out of 5)<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I wasn’t
so smitten with the last Hobbit movie. Nobody
died and it took up 3 hours of my time for no good reason. Hobbit 2 doesn’t know when to end either but
it does at least have some wit and drive.
And Cate Blanchett is the hottest elf ever (she is an elf right? I get all these middle earth types mixed
up…).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">The
Hobbit 2 continues the quest of the dwarfs and the bloke out of The Office to
reclaim their homeland, and kill a dragon or something. On the way we meet the usual Orcs, which were
so menacing in the Lord of The Rings trilogy but for some reason are now tame
and cartoonish. We also meet Cate the hot elf and go for a barrel ride down a
river until we get to the dwarfs village.</span><br />
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Weee! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Once there I’m pretty sure the movie
is supposed to end – we’re 2 hours in by this point – but as usual Peter Jackson
keeps going and eventually calls time when the reel runs out. Phew!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-78406071597459865252014-01-02T10:29:00.002-08:002014-01-02T10:42:06.946-08:00Frozen<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span>④
(out of 5)<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Kids are
not the most discerning of audiences are they?
Sprinkle a little cartoon sugar over the screen and they’ll watch
anything. Add a dollop of cute lead, a flimsy
premise and a couple of catch phrases and the kids will lap it up. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I
remember taking my kiddies to see Rise of the Guardians, a dark and dreary
movie. They loved it! Ditto Brave (‘it was awesome’) and The Cat in The Hat (‘best movie ever!’). Kid’s movies… critic-proof!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Fortunately
Frozen is a good movie. I can’t remember
the plot – something about an Ice Queen, ice powers and a quest to, er, do
something. But it doesn’t matter because
Olaf the snowman is cute, the music is pleasant and, of course, everything
works out in the end (spoiler alert!
Oops). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-67144542400384092212014-01-02T10:29:00.000-08:002014-01-02T10:40:58.144-08:00Dallas Buyers Club<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes:</span> <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>② (out of 5)<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Matthew Mcconaughey
is a weird looking bloke. But his boney
limbed appearance in Dallas Buyers Club makes him all the more bizarre. As with many films I found myself distracted
by the actor at the expense of the character. So for this movie I was never
fully immersed. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Some
actors are able to fully inhibit their characters – Meryl Streep is the obvious
one that comes to mind – hey that’s not Meryl it’s Maggie! But too many, like Mcconaughey, fall short. </span><br />
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Another distraction was Jennifer Garner – why is she here exactly? And what is the purpose of her
character? And why is she no longer hot…?!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Distractions
aside, Dallas Buyers Club skips along nicely and the acting is all well and
good, but I couldn’t help thinking that this was all just a big vanity project
for Mcconaughey. A way out of his mostly
shallow macho man movies. Hopefully
he’ll beef back up next time and leave the skinny roles for a starving actor or
two. I hear Michael Cera is free...<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-50943465736922396232014-01-02T10:28:00.002-08:002014-01-02T10:40:01.150-08:00Die Hard<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span>④
(out of 5)<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">My wife
couldn’t believe I’d never seen this ‘classic’.
And, seeing as though cinemaclock reviewers gave it a 9.1 and it was the
middle of the Xmas vacation where there’s nothing else to do, I pretty much had
to go. And, Yippee Ki Ay - I’m glad I did!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">It’s
been 26 years since Die Hard was released so a plot summary should be
superfluous - right? If not I’ll just borrow
my 11 year old daughter’s brief summation:<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">‘It’s
like Towering Inferno meets Taken. With
Bruce Willis’. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">The best
part of movies like Die Hard is that they don’t take themselves too seriously. First off the terrorists are mostly white and
European – as if! These are folks you’re more likely to meet in a boardroom, on
a beach or in a weight room. And the
cops are all bumbling idiots, which is always fun to see. And there are many classic comedy
moments. Like the gun toting hoodlum stealing
a candy bar as he prepares to mow down the incoming special forces. Or the on-going references to Twinkies.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bruce
Willis might be mostly B-Movie bound these days but he always seems to be giving
a wink to the camera and that’s fine by me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Yippee
Ki Yay Mother *****! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-51775539419581515442014-01-02T10:27:00.004-08:002014-01-02T10:39:15.469-08:00The Butler<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes:</span> <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>② (out of 5)<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I
thought about doing one word movie reviews one time. If I had gone this route, The Butler’s review
would be simply: ‘Yawn’.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">The
Butler follows the real life travails of </span><span style="background: white; color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Cecil
Gaines – Forest Whitaker -</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">
from his modest roots as a cotton picker to the dizzy heights of White House
butlery serving 8 US presidents. The
problem with the story is that, once it gets going - nothing really
happens. Let’s face it, butlering is not
a particularly interesting profession, and Oprah Winfrey’s presence does
nothing to spice it up. You sort of feel
that Oprah just put herself in the frame to give the Oscar judges a subtle
poke.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">‘Hey folks
it’s me (again) – how about a trophy…?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">They’ll
need a big poke too to wake them up from this.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Zzzzzzzz. </span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-41257867453652976132014-01-02T10:27:00.001-08:002014-01-02T10:38:36.159-08:00BlackFish<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span>③ (out of 5)<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Does anyone
still go to Marineland? Are we all
still that stupid? Well that's a shame. Maybe movies
like Blackfish will tip the scale…?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Blackfish
tells the tale of Tilikum the Killer Whale, a ‘blackfish’ as the Native American’s
call them, a mammal which truly embraces its ‘killer’ label. After mauling a
trainer in Sealand of the Pacific</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">, Tilikum is moved from bathtub to
bathtub where he systematically torments and executes a slew of hapless
trainers. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">We watch eerie amateur
recordings and hear eye witness accounts of Tilikum’s kills and near kills and
scream along with the excited Aqualand crowds as they witness death and maiming
– all for just $15.99! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I was so depressed at the end I had to hop on the bus and go to the zoo.
</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-64920410608125625402014-01-02T10:26:00.004-08:002014-01-02T10:36:56.691-08:00Nebraska<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="background: #FB5E53; color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span>③ (out of 5)<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Nebraska
is a lovely little movie. Simple, to the point and sparce – no wasted time or
effort here. Nebraska features hardly
any dialogue, barely any plot and not a blip of colour...ah!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Will
Forte and his Dad head out on a road trip to claim an imaginary million dollar
sweepstake. The money they think they’ve
won might as well be coming from a Nigerian warlord but that doesn’t matter
because, at its heart, Nebraska is a movie about wasted lives and elusive
opportunities. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Nebraska
reminded me of Young Adult and Fargo.
The setting – Hawthorne, Nebraska mainly - aka ‘Anytown’ USA – literally
sets the scene. Long drawn out shots of
fading signs, strip malls, and empty fields informs us that nothing much ever happens
out this way and, most likely, never will.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">So, in
the absence of any real action we are left to observe the thoughts and feelings
of the quirky characters and their maddeningly mundane interactions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">There is
one scene with the family huddled around the TV watching the football. Glassy eyed stares all around, even as the on
field excitement abounds. The only interruption is the chatter about Uncle Ray’s
foot: <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">‘Ray’s
got a sore foot’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">‘Huh?’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">‘I said
your brother he’s got a sore foot!’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">‘Oh’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">‘It
feels better now though’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">‘OK’<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Nebraska
doesn’t make me want to go to Nebraska, but I’d be happy to pop in and watch a
game.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-78544595053069081042014-01-02T10:25:00.002-08:002014-01-02T10:35:54.547-08:00Anchorman 2<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Bullseyes: ①
(out of 5)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Will Ferrell
owes me an apology. And a refund. What with
all the hype and the comedy talent infused into Anchorman 2, you might assume
that this sequel had to be good right?
Hmm…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I was perplexed
by the cinemaclock (<a href="http://www.cinemaclock.com/"><span style="color: #002060; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;">www.cinemaclock.com</span></a>)
reviews, which I checked before heading out.
Folks gave the flick either a 1 or a 10, and very little in between. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">No help
there then.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I loved
the original Anchorman. It is goofy, off the wall and stupid. I was
hoping for more of the same here. But,
alas, Will Ferrell and the gang have single-handedly undone all of the goodwill
they created by making one stinker of a sequel.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">First
off the plot is lame and takes an age to get going. Back story and set up is fine if you keep it
brisk, but this movie is anything is brisk.
Anchorman 2 features a lot of those long drawn out, awkward scenes which
worked so well in the first movie and Talladega Nights. But the reason the grace before meals scene (</span><span style="color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuAUI_0knfk"><span style="color: #002060; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuAUI_0knfk</span></a></span><span style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> <span lang="EN-US">) and ‘Afternoon Delight’ (</span></span><span style="color: #002060; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MAhCpAS2AwA"><span style="color: #002060; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MAhCpAS2AwA</span></a></span><span style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> <span lang="EN-US">) worked so well is because they
were, well - funny. But when a scene
isn’t funny the only thing worse than leaving it in is drawing it out. I found myself cringing or yawning throughout
most of this movie. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">The last
20 minutes were especially pointless.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">He’s
gone blind! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">He’s
taming a shark! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Why…?! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Who
cares! It’s not like you had anything
better do to with your 20 minutes right?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></div>
<span lang="EN-US" style="color: #002060; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Will, that will be 8 dollars and 1 hour and 59 minutes please. Thank you.</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8601519786604687910.post-7957847469461627592013-12-16T08:40:00.001-08:002013-12-16T08:40:12.618-08:0012 Years a Slave in Tibet<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: #fb5e53; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">Bullseyes: <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span>③
(out of 5)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I procrastinated about going to see 12 Years a Slave in Tibet because I
had a feeling it was going to be boring.
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">My wife gave me fair warning as I was umming and ahing about whether to
go. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">“Your daughter went to see it the other day” she remarked, as I put on
my coat.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">“And…?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">“Uh”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">My wife accompanied the, ‘uh’ with a shrug.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">“What does ‘uh’ mean…?” I replied, mimicking the shrug.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I found out about 5 hours into the movie.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">There’s plenty of ‘uh’ in 12 Years a Slave. The main problem is that the
tale is just so grim, it’s hard to watch.
Especially certain scenes. Yikes,
I doubt even the Passion of The Christ had a whipping scene as graphic as the
one here. Director Steve McQueen gives us virtually nothing to lighten up the
mood. Even Brad Bitt’s inexplicable
appearance does little to raise a smile.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">And, as if to accentuate the agony, half way through the movie McQueen
sees fit to give us a wailing woman – a stolen slave, torn from her children by
a dastardly slave trader - who was also the bloke from Barney’s version (why do
Director’s insist on recycling actors we know from other movies? ‘Hey look, that bloke selling those two
sobbing children is Doctor Doolittle!’).
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">The wailing woman sobs for 15 minutes in the middle of the movie as if
begging us to leave (to be fair, lead actor </span><a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0252230/?ref_=tt_ov_st"><span class="itemprop"><span itemprop="name" style="font-size: inherit;"><span style="background: white; color: black; mso-themecolor: text1; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;">Chiwetel
Ejiofor</span></span></span></a> does tell her to shut up).<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Another issue with the movie is
the long silences. Those Tarantino like
cinematic indulgences where we get to stare at a field full of cotton, blowing
in the wind for 20, 30, 40 seconds…<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Pssh<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Ooh<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What’s going on…? <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You can’t create awe on
demand. Awe has to be earned. <o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
12 Years a Slave in Tibet isn’t
quite ‘Awe’ful but it’s not quite awe inspiring either.<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09190948833692517311noreply@blogger.com0